Romance Roadmap

Unfortunately, there’s no fool-proof way to foresee which direction our romantic relationships will take us. The path to “I do” and beyond is filled with twists, turns and rocks (and potholes!), and sometimes we get a little lost along the way. The key to navigating the rocky road of romance—and making the trip just a little bit smoother—is detecting troubled spots early on. Luckily, the June issue of SELF Magazine features a longevity test to discover how you can “break-up proof” your bond. If you and your partner have reached some unsteady ground, pick up the issue and get set for smooth sailing!

Jackie O’s Seduction Secrets

Excerpted from What Would Jackie Do by Shelly Branch and Sue Callaway, iVillage.com notes the rules of attraction made famous by former first lady Jackie O. If you’re having some trouble finding the right type of man (or you’re simply looking to incorporate some of Jackie O’s timeless grace and style into your own partner-seeking efforts) her seduction secrets may be worth a shot:

• Use flaws to your advantage
• Don't spook men needlessly
• Speak softly (and carry good lipstick)
• Don't scoff at matchmaking
• Be detached, and tune out all “dating” shows
• Make him the epicenter of your universe — at least until dessert arrives
• When three's a crowd, make it four
• Cozy up to the family kingpin
• It isn't over until the altar

Mix in her signature class and wit and you will certainly be a feminine force to be reckoned with!

Ever tried one (or more) of the above? Feel free to share—amusing anecdotes always welcome!

Five New Relationship Rules

Sarah Mahoney, writer at Good Housekeeping, recently named five (newly refreshed) marriage “guidelines” interpreted from some old “rules” we’re all familiar with. Mahoney says “there’s only a trace of truth in each fable — but there’s also the potential to retool them to make your relationship even closer. Here are five of the most enduring myths, plus new rules to replace them”:

• Myth: Never go to bed angry. If you don’t hash through every conflict right away, it’ll lead to resentment and ultimately blowups.
• New rule: Sleep on it. Conflicts are best dealt with when you have calmed down and are well rested.

• Myth: One day the two of you will just realize you’ve grown apart and fallen out of love.
• New rule: A marriage doesn’t run on feelings — it thrives because both spouses work hard on it.

• Myth: As you both get older, sex will simply stop mattering to you and your husband.
• New rule: There’s no reason you won’t grow more sexually connected.

• Myth: When the kids leave home, there will be nothing left to keep your marriage together.
• New rule: Your marriage can flourish in that new freedom.
  
  
• Myth: Every guy has a midlife crisis — any day, your spouse will drive off in a new red sports car.
• New rule: It’s not a crisis — and it’s not just for men.
  

Do you and your partner have any relationship “rules”?

Proposal Gone Wrong

A marriage proposal is something most women dream about when they’re young. We fantasize and daydream and have the wedding day mentally planned out in its entirety by age 10. It's supposed to be one of the most magical and memorable days of our lives.

So, why then, do men still not seem to understand what we're looking for? If you’re going to propose, we want it to be romantic and special. Taking us to see your favorite sports team and getting down on one knee in the middle of the court in front of millions of people, gentleman, is not our idea of romantic! Particularly if we’re not a big sports fan to begin with. Special for you? Sure! For us? Not so much.

If you’ve witnessed (or even better, survived) a proposal blunder, please share it with us, we’d love to hear about it!

New marriage trends: A Do or a Don't?

Glamour.com readers weighed in on what marriage trends were a do and which were a don’t. We agree with almost all of them. Let us know what you think!

• Walking down the aisle pregnant: It's a Don't, say 71%.
• Having a crazy-decadent wedding like Tom and Katie's: It's a Don't, say 70%.
• Having a life-size cake of you: It's a Don't, say 98%.
• Having guests donate to a charity instead of buying gifts: It's a Do, say 42%.
• Having an eco-friendly wedding: It's a Do, say 45%.
• Singing as you walk down the aisle: It's a Don't, say 95%.
• Having the photographer spend the entire weekend with you, including the morning after: It's a Don't, say 89%

Are You Breaking The Law?

Did you know that the U.S. has more laws regulating sexual behavior than all the European countries combined? Here are some interesting facts from Sexpert Yvonne K. Fulbright of Fox News that you may not have known:

• Sex toys are banned in some states like Alabama
• Intercourse between unmarried couples is illegal in Georgia
• Flirting is banned in San Antonio, Texas
• Oral sex is banned in Indiana
• Sexual positions beyond missionary are illegal in Washington, D.C.
• Sleeping naked is illegal in Minnesota
• You’re not allowed to engage in any type of public display of affection for more than 18 minutes in Idaho
• In Iowa, you've got a five-minute time limit to make out
• It’s illegal to smooch for more than one second if you’re in Halethorpe, Md.
• Women in Dyersburg, Tenn., cannot call a man for a date

There are many other strange laws of past and present (check them out here), but I feel that what we choose to do as adults in the privacy in our own homes is our business! So, are you one of the warm and fuzzy most wanted? A premarital perpetrator? Consummating criminal? Book ‘em Romeo!

Naughty Nintendo?

Nintendo is apparently taking their gaming experience to the next level – with the introduction of a game featuring a stripper pole for the Wii. Peekaboo Pole Dancing, a company which makes kitschy, novelty stripper pole kits for use in the home (one of which is endorsed by Carmen Electra), wants to release the game. "While details are sketchy, the thought is likely that such a game would take advantage of the Wii Fit balance board, which arrives next month. You can imagine how such a "game" might work, with players tasked with balancing on the pole for certain lengths of time or in certain positions."

While it certainly won’t make adult gamers “experts” at pole dancing, this may be the new generation of, ahem, interactive couple’s activities.

We’d love to hear your thoughts on this—is a stripper pole game totally wrong or just good (not too) clean fun?

Moving in Together…

We’ve all been there – that phase in a relationship when it’s time to decide if we should move in with our significant other or not. If you’ve decided you’re not living together until marriage then this may not be as relevant. But, if you (like many of us) have decided to cross that bridge a little earlier in your relationship, you understand what I’m talking about.

AskMen.com breaks moving in together down into three separate components: the bad, the good and the avoidable. The following tips are also listed on how to make the most of moving in together.

• Make it your own place
• Don't reveal everything at once
• Respect each other's space
• Share the responsibility
  

Regardless of what you decide, make sure it’s something you’re both ready for, and all the pieces should fall into place. (After a few extensive discussions and heated debates about folded bathroom towels and toothpaste caps.)

Time to Play Dress-Up

Live out your wildest fantasy today in honor of National Nurses Day! It’s a great time to dress up and have some fun with your significant other. You can get a costume at any Halloween store or novelty shop, and accessories can be found at any pharmacy. The question is will you play Doctor and Nurse or Nurse and Patient? How much special attention will he need? Be sure to check your vitals thoroughly ‘cus your heart is bound to be racing!

Cinco De Mayo

What a perfect time to send the kids off to grandmas and celebrate with a romantic fiesta-for-two. Escape with your partner for a fun-filled night or weekend getaway! Most places have Cinco De Mayo-themed events and some even offer all-inclusive weekends sure to provide lots of fiery fun and Latin-inspired entertainment.

If you can’t afford to get away, bring the party to you! Get some chips and salsa and mix up some margaritas to share with your sweetie. You’ll be having fun in no time at all! Let loose, toast to the celebration, and make some (spicy) memories! Ole!

The Husband's Bill of Rights

While I understand that men aren’t asking for the world, “The Husband's Bill of Rights” on MSN.com is a nice example of what men claim they need to make their marriage a happy one:

• Amendment I
  We have the right to go out with our friends at least once a month.
  
• Amendment II
  We reserve the right to dislike your friend's husbands.
  
• Amendment III
  We have the right to have a few things of ours in the house.
  
• Amendment IV
  We have the right not to be scolded by you.
  
• Amendment V
  We have the right to teach our sons how to burp and fart.
  
• Amendment VI
  We have the right to teach our children how to defend themselves.
  
• Amendment VII
  We have the right to as much reading material in the bathroom as we need.
  
• Amendment VIII
  We have the right to watch the big game.
  
• Amendment IX
  We have the right to the remote when we're on the couch.
  
• Amendment X
  We have the right to still use chivalry.

I think I can work with this list. My only stipulation is that you have to share the remote sometimes, sorry boys! If you have a problem with any of these rules, we want to hear about it!